As you know, I’ve been
wasting spending some time on a few D/s dating sites (primarily CM and Alt, with a bit of FL thrown in when I can stomach the clique-ishness of it). In my most humble of opinions, CM is probably the best out there, given that it is free and generally easy to navigate. Alt is more or less a “Meet My Cock” site as, I swear to fuck, that is what 95% of the Dominants use as their profile pic. This would likely appeal to anyone who is only looking for cock, but I am looking for a brain and body to go with it.
Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of men on CM with cock shot profile pics, but not nearly as many as there are on Alt. I have (briefly) dated (men who claimed to be) Dominants from Alt in the past (I’ve never had a Master, as of yet) but they always turned into submissive jelly in real life, which obviously would have been very disappointing for someone who needs to be controlled and dominated 24/7. As far as I can recall, I have never met anyone from CM in person, but do wish I’d met JD (still haven’t gotten around to blogging about him yet, but I will).
FL did not exist the last time I was actively seeking a Dominant online and I must say that I find it a bit off-putting. It seems to be a clever enough social network for a few genuine “lifestylers” (God how I hate that term, but can’t think of a more succinct description), which is nice — but right alongside them is a group people who have obviously read too many (badly written) books. This bothers me more than it should, I suppose. Perhaps it is because I would love to be able to just sign up with eHarmony or some other vanilla site and have thousands of sane, sexy men to choose from, instead of having to search for a needle in a haystack among the misogynists and nutcases who already permeate at least 50% of the dating sites catering to those seeking a D/s relationship.
As I continue to analyze why I am so bothered by this, I am reminded of the time I’d accompanied some gay friends to a gay/lesbian bar (15 years ago), and a
very scary vampire lesbian reacted to my (polite!) rejection by snarling and asking what the fuck I was doing in ‘their’ bar, when there were plenty of straight bars I could go play in. I wasn’t sure how I should feel about the question/accusation. After all, my being there didn’t affect the actual number of lesbians who were in “their” bar at that particular moment, so from a purely statistical perspective, my being there didn’t decrease her chances of meeting an actual lesbian.
Upon reflection, however, she did waste her valuable time checking me out and pursuing me under the (logical) presumption that I, like her, was hanging out in a gay/lesbian bar because I was an actual lesbian. Ultimately, she didn’t waste weeks or months on me (as often seems to happen to many of the genuine “lifestylers” who use sites like CM, Alt and FL), but I can appreciate her frustration nonetheless.
So far, I’ve been thrilled to hear that a few of you actually met your Doms/Masters on Alt/CM, as it gives me hope! What I’d really love to know is, where the rest of you found your Masters/Doms/subs/slaves? Really, I’d love to know… please tell me? Pretty please? I need inspiration. I’d even be thrilled to know where you met those from your past, just for the sake of analysis. Did you find your Masters/Doms/subs/slaves IRL, on D/s dating sites, at munches? Or, if you’ve got friends/acquaintances in the “lifestyle” and happen to know how they met their own Masters/Dom(me)s/subs/slaves, I’d love to hear that, as well. Not that you have to tell me anything at all, obviously! But to anyone willing to share, I thank you in advance.
I could use the inspiration.